Category: Rants

Shit that pisses me off.

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Gear Gigs Rants

To the asshole who stole my hardware case

There’s an armpit of a town about an hour north of here we play gigs in. This town is like the freaking twilight zone. It’s a combination of dumbass rednecks who love Lynard Skynard and mullet wearing city slickers who listen to Metallica. My band plays neither of those.

Strange thing about this town (among many) is that the clubs cycle crowds. One month a certain club is the hot place and sells out constantly. Next month it’s a ghost town.

Fortunately (I guess) we were at the hopping place and played a fairly successful gig. The stage is in the back of the club. There’s a back patio about 12 feet deep and then the parking lot. The load out is easy: off the stage, 12 feet of patio into trunk of car.

I have to pack my gear in a certain order for it to fight right. I loaded out my hardware case, ran back inside to grab a couple of drums, and when I got back outside my hardware case was gone. This had to be no more than 30-45 seconds.

Inside my hardware case are all the stands and pedals for my kit, drum sticks and about 300 pairs of ear plugs. What a haul for this asshole eh? For his efforts he gets a hi hat stand with no hi hats, a bass drum pedal with no bass drum, bass drum legs with no bass drum, a tom mount with no tom, a snare stand with no snare, a drum stool with no top and 300 pairs of ear plugs. How much crack can he buy after he pawns that useless shit at the pawn shop?

Much of that hardware had to be special ordered to be replaced…. Ever order a drum stool without the stool?

So to the asshole who stole my hardware case: I hope you got a great hit of crack. Maybe you got lucky, overdosed and choked to death on your own vomit.

Categories
Rants

I get the last laugh


Remember my problem with this crappy company called awedeals.com?

They’re the assholes who sold me CDs that were so bad, some even had tire tracks in them:

The final report is in… I had tried to email, call, fax, send notes via pigeon to these assholes about getting a refund for the garbage the sold me. No reply.

So I called my credit card company and started up a dispute. They were cool and told me that my account would be credited provisionally while they investigate my claim. I gladly gave them awedeals’ phone number (which only has a message and doesn’t even give you the option of leaving a freaking message. Even if you could leave a message, they wouldn’t reply). I gladly gave them their mailing address. I gladly gave them their email address. I simply knew that if they tried to contact them at all, they’d get nowhere.

A couple of weeks later my bank informed me that I needed to ship back the bad product. No problem. I sent it off and gave the bank the tracking number. Then about two weeks later, the package I sent came back. These assholes at awedeals.com have f’ing the client over down to a science. Think about this: They don’t talk to you about returns. They simply have a standard email and page on their site instructing you to send your product back to a specific address, along with your order number. All these jerks do is simply refuse the returns.

I just got the final letter from my bank. After completing the investigation, my provisional credit is now FINAL! I can imagine what my bank went through. They probably tried to contact them a few times and just gave up.

So here’s a toast to awedeals.com. I got the last laugh you assholes. I got my money back. If they haven’t already, VISA will soon be yanking your merchant account. If they haven’t already, I’m sure the Better Business Bureau will be contacting you. Actually, they’ll be attempting to contact you. Oh, and I’m sure you’ll be hearing from the California State Tax commission. You see, me and a shit pile of your other out of state clients weren’t supposed to be paying California sales tax. Not only have you been illegally collecting sales tax from out of state, I’d be willing to bet that dough hasn’t found it’s way to the California state tax commission at all.

My friends and I have some work to do. We need to help keep other people from being screwed by awedeals.com. Friends, and awedeals haters alike please comment on this post.

Categories
Gigs Random Rants

Why would you?

When I play gigs I spend a lot of time bashing the skins and just observing the strange people in the audience. There are a few things I just don’t get.

Why would you cover your body with tatoos? Do you think this is attractive? It makes you look dirty.

Why would you pierce your ears and make the hole the size of a coke can? Do you think this is cool or attractive? It isn’t.

Why would you stick a metal spike through your nose, your eybrow, your neck etc? Do you think you are original? We’ll you’re not. You look like the thousands of other losers that are doing the same thing.

Why would you (female) wear a belly shirt when you are a fat ass? Do you think other people in the club want to see your fat belly hanging out of your belly shirt? We don’t want to see it. Do us a favor and wear some baggy clothes that cover up your gross body.

Why would you (male) wear those stupid looking rapper pants that are gigantic and have them falling down to your knees so your boxers are showing? You look like a stupid loser. Let me loan you a belt you bonehead. Who would want to hire you for a decent job? Who would want to marry you and spend a lifetime with your ugly ass? Besides that, you’re white.

Why would you wear your baseball hat sideways? Because you are too stupid to realize it fits a certain way. You think you are cool? You are a moron. Like George Carlin says “How can you trust a person who is too fucking stupid to put a baseball hat on straight?”

Why do you talk like a rapper when you are a freaking wonder bread white guy from some middle class white neighborhood in Utah? You’re not from the ghetto.

Why would you think it is cool to act like you are from Compton? All the poeple who live there wish they could get out.

Why would you flash gang signs with two or three fingers? You’re not in a gang. I know why you do it…you’re flahing your IQ.

Categories
Gigs Rants

Need a break

Had a gig in a dive last night. I was told that we had an opening band so I wouldn’t have to show up until 10:45pm. So I show up at 10:30 and while walking in the door I meet the guitar player for the 2nd opening band. So this means I won’t go on stage until midnight or later.

Being a non smoker and an extremely light drinker (about once/month), hanging around in smoky bar for an hour and a half didn’t seem fun. So I drove around town, gassed up the car and killed some time.

Once we were on stage I didn’t have much more fun. I love playing the drums but this place was FULL of cigarette smoke. I really hate smoke. The sound guy didn’t do a very good job and the freaking vocals were on the verge of feedback all night.

I also started to feel the slightest signs of my tennis elbow coming back.

I’m kind of burned out on these gigs we’ve been doing at these dives for crappy money. I think it’s time for me to take a break and bail on gigs for a couple of months.

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