Author: admin

Categories
Boneheads Musicians Recording

How to get a record deal

I’ve been asked thousands of times “how do I get a record deal?” Most people think this is an extremely complex question with many different possibilities. But it really is simple. When people ask me this quesion I give them all the same answer:

Shop at 7-11.

Yes, shop at 7-11. This is how to get a record deal. I’ll explain:

There once was a rock band with a decent female singer that I had done many albums with. This band was just like any other rock band trying to “make it.” They practiced twice a week, did shows, released CD’s, sent their discs in to record companies etc. They were doing all the usual things a band does to break into the big time.

One day the female singer stopped in at 7-11 to pick up some sundries. On her way out she bumped into a guy and dropped all of her groceries. The guy was very nice, and helped her pick up her stuff. Introductions insued. The conversation soon led to him saying “I’m an A&R guy with XXX record company (one of the big 5), and her saying “I’m a singer.”

One thing led to another (don’t know if any sexual favors were involved), and she was offered a recording contract. The record company only wanted her so she immediately dumped her band in a very sour situation. She then moved to LA.

She spent 2 years in LA working on her album. Then one day, record company XXX went through some management changes and all the A&R guys were canned. When the A&R gets canned, usually their artists get canned as well unless they are proven sellers.

She returned from LA with no record deal, no money and no band.

Categories
Musicians

THE BAD PLUS live album drops this spring!

NEW LIVE ALBUM DROPS THIS SPRING!

Available Exclusively Online Beginning Tuesday, April 5

The Bad Plus is pleased to announce the upcoming release of Blunt Object – Live in Japan. Recorded in Tokyo in 2004, this live set features songs from both Bad Plus studio albums, as well as a couple of previously unreleased covers. It will be available exclusively online – – not in stores.

Blunt Object – Live in Japan features 8 previously unreleased performances including radical new interpretations of “We Are The Champions” & “My Funny Valentine”.

CD exclusively available from SonyMusicStore.com April 5th. Preorder your copy NOW and receive on release date – – April 5th!

www.thebadplus.com

If you’ve never heard The Bad Plus, YOU MUST BUY ALL OF THEIR ALBUMS.

CLICK HERE for my first Bad Plus review.

Categories
Gigs Random Rants

Why would you?

When I play gigs I spend a lot of time bashing the skins and just observing the strange people in the audience. There are a few things I just don’t get.

Why would you cover your body with tatoos? Do you think this is attractive? It makes you look dirty.

Why would you pierce your ears and make the hole the size of a coke can? Do you think this is cool or attractive? It isn’t.

Why would you stick a metal spike through your nose, your eybrow, your neck etc? Do you think you are original? We’ll you’re not. You look like the thousands of other losers that are doing the same thing.

Why would you (female) wear a belly shirt when you are a fat ass? Do you think other people in the club want to see your fat belly hanging out of your belly shirt? We don’t want to see it. Do us a favor and wear some baggy clothes that cover up your gross body.

Why would you (male) wear those stupid looking rapper pants that are gigantic and have them falling down to your knees so your boxers are showing? You look like a stupid loser. Let me loan you a belt you bonehead. Who would want to hire you for a decent job? Who would want to marry you and spend a lifetime with your ugly ass? Besides that, you’re white.

Why would you wear your baseball hat sideways? Because you are too stupid to realize it fits a certain way. You think you are cool? You are a moron. Like George Carlin says “How can you trust a person who is too fucking stupid to put a baseball hat on straight?”

Why do you talk like a rapper when you are a freaking wonder bread white guy from some middle class white neighborhood in Utah? You’re not from the ghetto.

Why would you think it is cool to act like you are from Compton? All the poeple who live there wish they could get out.

Why would you flash gang signs with two or three fingers? You’re not in a gang. I know why you do it…you’re flahing your IQ.

Categories
Gigs Rants

Need a break

Had a gig in a dive last night. I was told that we had an opening band so I wouldn’t have to show up until 10:45pm. So I show up at 10:30 and while walking in the door I meet the guitar player for the 2nd opening band. So this means I won’t go on stage until midnight or later.

Being a non smoker and an extremely light drinker (about once/month), hanging around in smoky bar for an hour and a half didn’t seem fun. So I drove around town, gassed up the car and killed some time.

Once we were on stage I didn’t have much more fun. I love playing the drums but this place was FULL of cigarette smoke. I really hate smoke. The sound guy didn’t do a very good job and the freaking vocals were on the verge of feedback all night.

I also started to feel the slightest signs of my tennis elbow coming back.

I’m kind of burned out on these gigs we’ve been doing at these dives for crappy money. I think it’s time for me to take a break and bail on gigs for a couple of months.

Categories
Random

We’re ahead of the curve

SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) – Internet media company Yahoo Inc. (Nasdaq:YHOO – news) is likely to build and buy tools that help its users create, publish and search blogs, Susquehanna Financial Group Marianne Wolk said in a note on Friday.

Full Article